How friends and family can helpThis article is intended for friends or relatives of someone experiencing domestic violence.
Sometimes it can be distressing and frustrating if you have a friend or relative who you know is in a domestic violence relationship. You want to help her, but she keeps putting up with the abuse, making excuses for him.
Your response to her situation is really important. If she feels supported and encouraged, she may feel stronger and more able to make decisions. If she feels judged or criticized, she could be afraid to tell anyone else about the abuse.
It can be hard for someone to understand why someone would stay with their partner who is abusive, and from the outside it may seem easier to leave then it actually is.
There are lots of reasons why women feel they can't leave. Some of them include:
- He's made threats to kill himself if she leaves and she feels guilty
- He's made threats to hurt her, the kids or her family if she leaves
- He says that she's an unfit mother and he'll make sure she doesn't get the kids.
- She has low self esteem from all the putdowns
- She still loves him, he's not abusive all the time
- She doesn't think anyone will believe her because he seems like such a nice guy to everyone else